Me no drink....No more

Me no like alcohol. It give me the babble mouth and makes me dizzy. Tequila not my friend, causes me to act like monkey at the circus. Now wife is angry, must ride the rickety wagon and make amends. If me contrite, me get out of the dog house. Then dog happy too.
It not be so bad if me only do it once, but I is doing it alla time.
Me look for different way to handle me problems.

Me stay on the straight and narrow